MEDINA: There was no choir at Medina United Methodist Church on Saturday afternoon, no children singing Happy Birthday to Jesus or guest appearances by Santa.
Candles flickered in the dim light of the sanctuary as about 20 people, some alone, others in groups of two or three, slid into pews they shared with no one else.
“For some, Christmas can be difficult,” the Rev. David Tennant told the congregants at this special 2 p.m. Christmas Eve service.
Whether they were grieving a death, a divorce, a job loss or some other burden, Tennant invited them to listen, pray and meditate because, he said, even if they were lonely at Christmas, they were never alone.
This was the Medina church’s fourth or fifth Blue Christmas service, a trend that has grown in churches across Greater Akron and the United States since the 1990s.
Blue Christmas — often called Longest Night — services are toned-down holiday events aimed at providing hope and healing to those who may not feel like celebrating Christmas at all.
Pam Kokomoor has attended Longest Night services at Bath United Church of Christ since they were launched.
Kokomoor’s son, Zachary, died in an accident in 2009. He was 24.
“I almost feel like these services are just for me,” Kokomoor said. “I think everyone who attends feels like that.”
The Bath church has two Blue Christmas services, each held on the winter solstice, which is the longest night of darkness in the year. One is in the afternoon for people who have trouble driving after dark, and another in the evening for people who work during the day.
This year’s winter solstice fell on Wednesday and Kokomoor, as she usually does, attended the evening service alone, finding solace in the candlelit darkness.
“It’s nice to be around people helping you not forget, helping you remember,” Kokomoor said.
Many people avoid talking about Zachary because they don’t want to bring up pain. But Kokomoor said she longs to hear her son’s name spoken aloud because, in a way, that keeps Zachary in this world with her.
At Blue Christmas, Kokomoor and others are encouraged to speak the names of those they’ve loved and lost, to reveal whatever sadness is inside them.
“I was a very joyous, outgoing person and I think people think that I still am. I let them think that, but my life has changed,” Kokomoor said. “Zachary is one thin veil away.”
Every church has its own take on Blue Christmas or Longest Night services. None of the six church leaders interviewed for this story expected a crowd.
The Rev. Maureen Webber, an associate minister who spearheaded Blue Christmas in Bath, said her church has about 800 members and about 20 or 25 people attend each Blue Christmas service.
Most are grieving a death, she said, or a grim health diagnosis. But a man in his 60s once attended with his adult son who was grieving a divorce.
“These services allow us to be Christ’s hands and heart in a hurting world, to show that we care,” Webber said.
Loss of pastor
Unitarian Universalist Church in Kent, which has occupied the same building for 150 years, held its Blue Christmas on Thursday.
Lori Fatchet-McGee, a lay minister who helps lead the service, expected a different crowd this year.
Many members were grieving the loss of the church pastor, who moved out of state to be closer to family. Others at the church with a liberal faith tradition were grieving a political loss, she said, and remained fearful of a changing political climate after the election of Donald Trump.
Unlike many churches, where Blue Christmas worshippers have little interaction with one another, the Kent Unitarian church wants its worshippers to connect.
Fatchet-McGee said they have movable pews and often arrange them so people can make eye contact with one another during their Blue Christmas.
“We want to break that isolation, to show people they are not alone,” she said.
Family members share
On Saturday, Rolinda Dodd, 77, sat in the back right pew of Medina Methodist church with her granddaughter and great-granddaughter for the Blue Christmas service.
“I couldn’t survive without this,” Dodd said.
Her two children died in recent years and her granddaughter Christine Phillips, 28 — a single mother with a 3- and 4-year-old — is now raising Dodd’s great-granddaughter, Jasmine Phillips, 11.
It’s been a rough time for the family. On Saturday morning, Dodd went to her granddaughter’s home and insisted both she and Jasmine come to Blue Christmas.
“They needed this. I know they did,” Dodd said.
Church is nothing new for the family. All attend Medina United Methodist Church weekly.
But Blue Christmas was different.
The sermon was called “Another Charlie Brown Christmas” and emphasized that tears of sadness often mix with joy.
The congregation was invited to light candles in memory of those they loved or for whatever sorrow they had.
Christine and Jasmine Phillips each lit a tea light, Christine for her mother and sister, Jasmine for her own mom who died recently.
After the service, Christine confided that she’s had a hard time getting out of bed since Thanksgiving. Raising her own children and Jasmine has been difficult.
The service, she said, helped.
Jasmine seemed transformed. She said she was teary a couple of times, especially during Communion.
“But it was calming,” Jasmine said, smiling. “I feel relieved, like I let go of all the stress.”
Amanda Garrett can be reached at 330-996-3725 or agarrett@thebeaconjournal.com.